When entering into negotiations, whether for buying a home, negotiating a job offer, or even buying a car, you might be tempted to throw out the first number or offer. However, there’s a strong case for waiting and letting the other party offer first. Should you offer first in negotiations?
1. Gauge the Other Party’s Position
One of the biggest advantages of letting the other side offer first is giving you valuable insight into their expectations, priorities, and limits. By holding off and hearing their initial offer, you understand how far apart your goals may be—or how closely aligned they already are.
For example, if you’re selling a home and the buyer makes an initial offer higher than expected, you’ve instantly gained the upper hand in the negotiation. Had you offered first, you might have anchored the conversation around a lower price and lost that advantage.
2. Avoid Anchoring Yourself to a Lower Offer
Psychologically, the first number on the table often becomes the anchor for the rest of the negotiation. If you offer first, especially if you’re unsure what the other party is willing to accept, you might unintentionally set the bar lower than they would have offered. This can lead to leaving value on the table.
On the other hand, if the other party offers first, you can work from their starting point and potentially negotiate up from there.
3. Use Their Offer as a Benchmark
When the other party goes first, you can use their offer as a benchmark for your counteroffer. You now have more information about their range, allowing you to frame your response accordingly.
For instance, if you’re in a salary negotiation and your employer offers a number first, you can assess whether it aligns with your expectations or industry standards. You then can ask for more if the offer is too low or gracefully accept (or slightly increase) if it’s higher than expected.
4. Maintain Flexibility
Not offering first keeps you flexible in how you respond. You aren’t boxed in by a number you suggested and can respond strategically. Once you hear their offer, you can evaluate and decide on the best course of action—negotiating, accepting, or walking away.
By maintaining flexibility, you also leave room for creativity in the negotiation. You can explore other aspects, such as adding value in non-monetary terms (like quicker closing dates in real estate or additional benefits in job offers).
5. Create a Power Dynamic
Sometimes, the side that speaks first can lose the psychological upper hand in a negotiation. By holding off and letting the other party offer first, you subtly shift the power dynamic in your favor. The other side may feel the need to justify their offer, allowing you to ask questions and make them reveal more information about what they value.
This gives you leverage to guide the conversation where you want it to go.
While not offering first is a common negotiation tactic, context is key. There may be situations where offering first can be advantageous—especially if you have superior knowledge or if the other side is hesitant to make a move.
But in many cases, letting the other party offer first gives you an edge. It provides crucial information, helps avoid anchoring yourself to a lower value, and allows for more flexibility and strategic response.
